Phone sex is a fun and exciting way to enjoy sexual intimacy with your partner. But before you dive in, it’s important to understand the benefits of this type of sex and how to have a successful session.
You can try a few different things to make your phone sex sessions more sexy and enjoyable. Here are some tips to help you get started.
It’s a great way to build intimacy
Phone Sex is a great way to build intimacy and rekindle the sexual flame between you and your partner. It also allows you to communicate your desires in a more creative, arousing way that’s less intimidating for both of you than in-person phone sex.
Having an intimate conversation with someone who isn’t physically nearby is one of the best ways to cultivate intimacy within a relationship, according to Adina Mahalli, certified relationship expert at Maple Holistics. She adds that while some people might snicker at phone sex, it can be a way to increase communication and sensitivity in your relationship, which can help you in other parts of your relationship.
Before you get started, it’s important to establish consent. If you’re not sure whether your partner is into phone sex, ask them before you begin. It’s also a good idea to establish a mutually agreeable time and place for the conversation, as it can make it more exciting.
When it comes to sexy language, the key is being descriptive and painting a clear picture of what you want. This helps your partner imagine what you’re talking about and make them feel a part of it, too.
It’s also a good idea to practice your dirty talk before you go for it on the phone. Even if you’re not sure about how to phrase things, practicing with other lovers or friends will help you develop a good vocabulary and sexy grammar.
Another fun and arousing way to initiate phone sex is by role playing or creating a fantasy together. This is a great way to get your partner’s imagination going, and it’s a great opportunity to explore all sorts of sexual fantasies.
Once you’ve established consent, it’s a good idea to take turns speaking during the session, as this will keep both partners engaged and help keep the conversation flowing. This will also help avoid having to switch off too quickly, which can be uncomfortable.
If you’re unsure how to get your lover involved in the phone sex, reading is an excellent choice. You can pick up a sexy book to read aloud, or even share a poem with your lover. As long as you’re descriptive and you’re able to paint a vivid picture of what you want, your lover will be completely turned on.
It’s a great way to get to know someone
Phone sex is a great way to connect and build intimacy with your partner, even if you live far away from each other. It’s not only a fun way to connect, but it’s also a great way to get to know your partner’s sexual interests.
Having conversations about the type of phone sex you want to have with your partner is key to creating a sexy experience, says certified sex expert Danny Garrett. This could mean a really frank conversation where you ask for enthusiastic consent, or a more laid-back approach that drops a hint and lets your partner decide if they want to have some sex on the phone.
If you’re not a fan of dirty talk, try reading erotica together or listening to audio erotica. It’s also a great way to stimulate your imagination and create a fantasy you both can enjoy.
Another great way to have a sexy phone session is to pretend you’re someone else, either in a movie or on a TV show, suggests certified sex expert Jennifer Michels. This can help keep things flowing and keep you from feeling too self-conscious about talking sexy on the phone, she says.
You can also talk about a fantasy you have about what you’d like your partner to do to you on the phone, as long as it’s sexually arousing and well-detailed. This can include describing elaborate scenarios that your partner would have to work to imagine, as well as talking about the kinds of things you want them to touch you with and how you’d like them to move.
It’s also a good idea to talk about any boundaries you have regarding digital desire, and whether or not your partner is comfortable sending you photos, videos, and voice notes while having phone sex with you. Having this open discussion will ensure that the whole thing is going to be mutually enjoyable, and that you’re both on the same page.
Lastly, make sure to set up a time for your phone sex, and cancel any calls or messages that may interrupt it. If you have a partner who works a lot, this is important because it can be easy for them to get frustrated if they’re interrupted during sex on the phone.
It’s a great way to get horny
Phone sex isn’t for the faint of heart, but it can be a lot of fun. The key is to set the right mood and use some of your best dirty-talk skills to get the party started.
Phone sex works by tapping into what sexologist Rebecca Alvarez Story calls the “sexy ears” of your partner. The sexy sound of their voice and moans are seriously arousing, she says. You can also use a variety of pleasure products to enhance the experience, from your own hands and bits to toys.
If you’re feeling adventurous, you can add some mutual masturbation and orgasm into the mix. But, be sure to ask your partner first if they’d be interested in it.
Another great way to boost your phone sex game is to dip into your fantasy bank. Describe sexual scenarios and settings that might not be feasible in real life, according to sex expert Rosa Sierra. This can include everything from public sex in a restaurant booth or against library stacks to BDSM, where you pretend you’re with your partner but they’re actually with someone else.
You can also create a sexy environment by dimming the lights, playing sexy music, and pouring yourself a drink. Having a cozy, private space is the best way to make phone sex a lot of fun.
It’s a good idea to use headphones if you’re not comfortable with the sounds of your partner’s voice, or they may have trouble hearing it over their phone. If you’re using a headset, you should turn off notifications so you can focus on the conversation.
Once you’ve got your groove going, sex advocate Rosa Sierra recommends taking things at a slower pace to help both parties relax. It’s also OK to stop if you feel uncomfortable or distracted.
It’s important to remember that phone sex isn’t always for everyone, and even if your partner likes it, they might not be comfortable with it on the next occasion. You might need to try it a few times before you find a groove that feels natural and sexy to both of you.
It’s a great way to build trust
Whether you’re new to phone sex or you want to give it another try, phone sex can be a great way to build trust. Unlike in-person sex, you don’t have to worry about your partner’s privacy when having phone sex, so you can focus on communicating your desires and exploring what it feels like to let them out.
Michels says you should be upfront about what you want out of the session and ask for consent. That could look like a frank conversation where you straight up ask for enthusiastic consent or it could be more subtle, such as dropping hints that you’re excited about trying something new and seeing how your partner responds. Either way, it’s important to get their approval before sending nudes or engaging in sexy talk.
It’s also a good idea to be open about how it will work, especially if you’re planning to have more than one call. That’s because it can be difficult to predict what your partner will feel like if you don’t know where they are in the process.
In order to be safe, you should also make sure your partner knows that they can always take breaks if they need to and that there’s no pressure to continue if they don’t feel comfortable with it. This will help prevent any potential problems later on.
Finally, Michels recommends getting familiar with the language you’ll use during phone sex by reading erotic fiction together until you feel comfortable enough to describe what it is you want. Then, you can start to use that sexy language during the actual phone call.
Fantasy is a fun way to activate your imagination during a phone call, so deLune suggests describing what it would feel like to have sex in public or other sexual scenarios that may not otherwise be available to you in real life. You can also share a past shared sexual experience as a starting point, she says.
Phone sex is also a great way to get your partner psyched up, so don’t be afraid to show them you’re ready to go all in. Don’t forget to bring out the orgasms if you’re feeling them!